... have the good fortune to find yourself a two-room suite in a hotel that's an oasis of calm, yet located amid bustling streets and so close to the Trevi Fountain that you can practically dip your toes in the water by dangling your foot out of the window. ... make sure you're wearing a robust pair of shoes. It's a wonderful city to explore by foot, with stunning surprises around every corner, and the Archaeological Park of the Colosseum alone is enormous, so you're guaranteed to smash your daily step count.
... check out the Colosseum itself - it's world famous for a reason. (Don't bother with the audio guide, though.)
... marvel at the immaculate quality of the wall paintings in the House of Augustus - especially in the Room of the Masks - and contemplate what it must have felt like for the archaeologists who first unearthed them after two millennia.
... venture into each and every church with an open door - after all, you never know where you might stumble upon a trio of Caravaggio paintings. (Well, I do now - the Church of San Luigi dei Francesi.)
... meet a new saint in the Pantheon (and remember it's called the Pantheon, not the Parthenon). Or maybe it was just a trick of the light shining through that extraordinary ceiling?
... gatecrash a wedding at the Basilica Santa Maria in Aracoeli.
... go underground to learn about the Vicus Caprarius and the ancient water tanks that feed the Trevi Fountain (and be surprised to discover a subterranean lecture theatre too).
... stroke a mog or five at the Largo di Torre Argentina, home to the ruins of four temples and a theatre, and now a cat sanctuary.
... patiently make your way through the very dry Capuchin Museum to be freaked out by the astonishing architectural sculptures made of monks' bones in the crypt. Each room is like a new 3D black metal album cover.
... take some fashion tips from the snazzy guards at the Vatican.
... climb to the top of the Janiculum Hill, not so much for the monument to Garibaldi as for the view of the city.
... swerve the obvious tourist traps when looking for places to eat and accept that a permanent queue and a bouncer on the door is a positive sign. At Piccolo Buco, practically opposite our hotel, very good things come to those who wait - in our case, pizza topped with yellow tomato base, spicy sausage, smoked cheese and crispy fried courgette discs, with an out-of-this-world panna cotta to finish.
... head across the river to Travastere for some of the nicest bars, and sample the abbacchio al forno (lamb cooked with garlic and herbs on a bed of roast potatoes) - a delicious local delicacy best enjoyed (in my experience) al fresco in the early evening, with a limoncello spritz or glass of crisp white wine and the news that Newcastle have qualified for the Champions League.
... be wowed by the fresh produce available even in the Roman equivalent of Tesco Express.
... make friends with a freaky cannibalistic ice cream cone man.
It's fair to say we crammed a lot into the space of a mere four nights and three and a half days - and yet it still feels as though we barely scratched the surface. A return visit is very much on the cards ...
