"I wasn't bullied. I allowed some pretty dysfunctional kids to reveal their dysfunction through the medium of hitting me"

Alan Partridge is back (again), this time with a podcast recorded at home called From The Oasthouse, and pretty much every single moment of this interview with the Guardian's Rich Pelley is solid gold - from Lynn's recent drink-driving incident to his enthusiasm for social distancing ("Now I can say, 'Get your hands off me!' without appearing in any way rude"), his verdict on Boris Johnson, recollections of a disastrous family Christmas during his marriage to Carol and his underwhelming experience of "elite dating agency" Echelon ("We'd kiss, cuddle and talk about the garden. Very pleasant. Just nothing genital"). Probably my favourite detail, though, is the fact that his dog is called Seldom. Long may he continue to broadcast.