Sweet Jayne?

For the first time since it first started, I've been consciously avoiding 'Big Brother'. It's easier than you think if you just avoid Channel 4 altogether and never buy a paper.

Of course, I have picked the odd thing up from what I've read on the internet. That, for instance, there's a bloke with tourette's, which I'm sure must still be hilarious. And that one of the housemates, Leah, had unfeasibly large tits and worked in the sex shop near Alan's house in Nottingham.

And now, thanks to Kenny's link to Charlie Brooker's column in the Guardian, I have a good idea of what new housemate Jayne is like:

"An entire 'Trisha' studio audience condensed into one bellowing chub-armed fishwife, even in the self-obsessive wilds of the BB house Jayne stands out as an unusually raucous attention-seeker, which is saying something. Something bad. In real life she must be unbearable: truly military-grade awful. Her voice is so jarring, each time she opens her gob I feel like someone's cracked a paving stone over my head and danced around cackling".

As Brooker suggests, Endemol seem to have tired of torturing the housemates and turned to torturing the viewers instead. Which doesn't make me want to switch on.

Incidentally, it seems that Inspector Sands of Casino Avenue has been among those instrumental in encouraging BBC Four to commission a series of Brooker's 'Screenwipe', following the three pilot programmes screened earlier in the year - just take a look at the show's website. Good work Inspector!