Kill all Henmaniacs

"Am I the only one who is praying for Little Timmy Boy Henman to get his skinny arse kicked at Wimbledon, so we can enjoy tennis played by skilled, charismatic foreign players and not endure hours of hero-worship of a dull, over-privileged Home Counties washing-powder salesman?"

No, Darryl, you're certainly not the only one who wishes nothing but misfortune for Tim Henman. I for one am most definitely not a Henmaniac. He's a spoilt little Mummy's boy whose parents always look smug-ugly and who's become the acceptably clean-cut and charisma-free pin-up for Daily Mail reading Middle England.

Incidentally, we were having a conversation the other day about how inappropriate the nickname he's been ascribed is: "Tiger Tim". Surely some other species of animal would be more fitting? I was thinking along the lines of woodlouse or gnat. Any other suggestions?