In 2013, my cousin's husband Mike was nearly killed by a couch. Yes, really. And now he's written about the incident and his recovery for Cracked. It's a tale of abandonment by his friends, hellish constipation and flirting with nurses despite the fact that he'd been wearing paper underpants for more than six months - but, above all, how the experience of a close encounter with death is nothing like it's portrayed in popular culture.
Even still, his story can't really hold a candle to that of Juliane Koepcke, who as a 17-year-old survived a plane crash during which she fell two miles, landing in dense and treacherous jungle in Peru and trekking for ten days with a maggot-infested arm wound, a broken collarbone and a ruptured ligament in her knee before reaching civilisation.