Know Your Enemy

"I never eat fruits or vegetables at all, ever, and neither did my father before me, and while I am constipated, fat, breathless and weak, I am not yet dead. I can still manage to slither across the floor to my laptop every day to dribble out my interesting thoughts for money. Open your eyes! What actual evidence is there for the benefits of vegetables, the worms of the food world, scrabbling in the dirt, or of fruits, hanging limply from branches, like plastic bags full of dog excrement hurled into the trees of an East Anglian layby?"

Stewart Lee responds to the E coli scare by waging a brilliant all-guns-blazing assault on green, healthy, non-meaty stuff. I'd love to read Morrissey's reply...

(Thanks to Abbie for the link.)