Reasons To Be Cheerful #9

(If you're wondering what this is all about, click here.)

Pork scratchings

McCoys, peanuts, Cheesy Moments, Scampi Fries. All perfectly adequate, but there's one pub snack food that towers over them all like Darth Vader at an Ewok convention - pork scratchings.

Call them what you will - "pig in a bag" is my favourite - but pork scratchings laud it over anything else you care to name.

And most packets originate from the West Midlands. Look at the address on your packet and invariably it'll have a B or WV postcode. Walk into any cornershop here and you'll be faced with a veritable array of different bags to choose from, not just the small white packets found in (most) good pubs.

Spotting quality product is easy - if it's in a see-through bag and weighs at least 100g, then you should be parting with your cash. And don't listen to the naysayers - the hairier the better.

There's usually a warning on the packet: "Only recommended for people with strong healthy teeth". I don't know about you, but I take that as something of a challenge. It's one I'm yet to back down from, or lose.

Of course, finishing a packet is like banging another nail into your coffin - but you've only got one life, and you've got to enjoy it, right?